In September's issue of Elle the concept of the surrendered wife/girlfriend rears its head again, this time rebranded as passivity. It draws from the experiences of Laura Munson, a writer whose recent book This is Not the Story You Think it is.....A Season of Unlikely Happiness, tells of her reaction to her husband of twenty years telling her that he didn't love her anymore and wanted to leave her. What did she do in response to this? Nothing. In her words she simply "didn't buy it", so she just let him get on with whatever he felt he needed to get on with and quietly ignored it. After six months of this he crept back into family life again.
Driving in my car today, a song came on the radio that caused a tightness in my chest and a sudden, urgent need to change the station.
The song that prompted this was Don't Speak by No Doubt. It wasn't that I was mortally offended by Gwen Stefani's dulcet tones or the quality of the musicianship, it just reminded me of a bad break up. The funny thing is I can think about the man and the bad times we went through without getting remotely upset these days, but if I chance upon Don't Speak, or Lately by Stevie Wonder, I'm in bits. Even ten years after the relationship turned to dust.
The beautiful Lisa Snowdon, ex girlfriend of everyone's favourite bachelor Mr George Clooney, recently expressed her lack of faith that at the age of thirty nine she would ever find the man who would give her the marriage and babies she craved. This has prompted a flurry of magazine articles discussing what the issue was with seemingly gorgeous, intelligent women being unable to find the right man and whether they were simply being too demanding. Cue many women up in arms at the suggestion that they should "settle". "Because I'm worth it" became a mantra for Generation X, but this is a dangerous concept to hold too close to your heart. Now, slowly we are all starting to realise that having it all is a myth.
"Women like to be complimented on both their looks and their intelligence. I'm sure you've heard the question "Do I look fat in this?" before, most men have.
The reason they ask this is that they need to know that YOU still find them attractive regardless of what they think or anyone else thinks. They just need positive reinforcement from their partner to feel better about themselves."
How true is this for you? Are trust, intimacy, respect and positive reinforcement the standard, or is there something missing? And does it differ from woman to woman? Some women I know want someone who "won't be bothered by the fact that I probably earn more than them". Some want acres of personal space, while others like to be joined at the hip with their other half. One friend's entire relationship is based on the understanding that her boyfriend will never, ever request or offer a foot massage (she's a bit phobic).
So what about you? Take our poll and contact us to let us know what you want out of a relationship:
Spark, fireworks, magic, thunderbolts. Call it what you will, I need them. All of them if possible. In any relationship, I have to be hit in the face with something the completely takes me by surprise or I just don't think I'll ever feel it. I need that thing, that buzz that keeps me interested. There has to be...something. Doesn't there?
They say (whoever 'they' are) that a sneeze is one-seventh of an orgasm. Which seems a bit random really, like saying one pea is about one-twelfth of an artichoke.
But I digress. Some rapscallion with a thousand-frames-per-second camera came up with the idea of filming people sneezing, from the first tickle to the final, er, ejaculation, then sloooowwwwiiing down the playback. Check it out. What does it remind you of?
Earlier this week, a group of girls had a conversation on Twitter about first dates. Granted it would have been better placed in a bar with enough white wine to block out our most embarrassing moments, but there was a general consensus: They're usually AWFUL. But why is that first date so bad?
I'm not going beat around the bush with this: I think size matters. So do the lovely people behind this dubious 'dating' site who let you pick your man according to their penis size! Genius idea! Yes, it's all a bit tacky, but if you had the choice of knowing what you were getting before you, ahem, 'took the goods home with you', would you?
The male contraceptive jab was always going to attract a lot of attention. And it's been talked about a lot on TV this week. ITV seem to have an axe to grind about it, with one of the Loose Women stating yesterday "I wouldn't trust a man to take it. I can't even trust a man to put the rubbish out". I wasn't expecting a (male) doctor on This Morning to say the very same thing. Why wouldn't you trust a man to take a contraceptive jab?
'He's just not that into you' that familiar Sex and the City phrase and now the title of an entire film.
I was reading a piece in Style magazine on the train back to London last weekend which centered largely around the topics said statement and film title bring up. I must admit I don't usually read the editorial, more glance over where I can buy what that week but I got stuck into this one when I read the first paragraph.
'This, I promise is exactly what he said to me "right, I m calling you tomorrow and you'd better have your phone with you. I absolutely adore you. I have to know when I m seeing you again'
In September's issue of Elle the concept of the surrendered wife/girlfriend rears its head again, this time rebranded as passivity. It draws from the experiences of Laura Munson, a writer whose recent book This is Not the Story You Think it is.....A Season of Unlikely Happiness, tells of her reaction to her husband of twenty years telling her that he didn't love her anymore and wanted to leave her. What did she do in response to this? Nothing. In her words she simply "didn't buy it", so she just let him get on with whatever he felt he needed to get on with and quietly ignored it. After six months of this he crept back into family life again. 
digg this |
del.icio.us this
| 
Stumble It!
