You know what we don't see enough of anymore? People hitting each other with pillows.
It's a travesty.
But Urban London plan to address this with their flash pillowfight in Trafalgar Square on Friday 26 June, when Big Ben strikes 6.30pm.
Be there or be square! And if it rains (which is, let's face it, is quite likely. The ice gods walking down Carnaby Street is likely at this point), put your pillow in a plastic bag.
Here are the rules:
1) Tell everyone you know about PILLOW FIGHT (bring a pillow) !!!
2) Wait for the Big Ben to strike 6:30pm precisely and then start!
3) Don't hit anyone without a pillow (unless they want it kinky lol)
4) Don't hit anyone with a camera
5) Someone yells "Stop!", goes limp, taps out, their fight is over
6) SOFT pillows to be used ONLY
7) HAVE FUN!!!
But what if you don't have a pillow? What if you have a ukelele instead? And what if you're not in London?
Don't worry, we cater to all tastes. Well, at least three....
Ukeleleists! Ukeleleleleists! Ukeleleleleleleists! Whatever you call yourselves, London is the place to be on Saturday 20 June, because not only is it the London Uke Festival, but it's also a world record attempt!
The idea is to beat the current record for most-ukelele-players-in-one-place-playing-one-song. The song is The Beach Boys' Sloop John B, and you can download the lyrics, chords and video tutorials from the site. Non-ukelele players are also encouraged to pick up an instrument and twang along in a big cheat support.
And even if you're not the competitive type, how can you resist a line-up that includes karauke (karaoke ukelele!) and ukelele hip-hop? See? You can't.
And if you don't live in London and have no spare ukeleles or pillows? Well, you have a head, right? So send it to artist Karen Schmidt, who's on a mission to paint a 3" portrait a day.
Send me your head is the site where she showcases them - so send her your headshot by email, Flickr, YouTube, whatever. All she needs is your head and your permission to paint it
(I've sent her my head; I'll report back if she gets round to painting it...).
Ooh and remember - comments are working again! So speak your brains below.
Photograph: sheiladeeisme, Flickr.