I'm writing this from my bed. Ahh, those lazy freelancers, you might chuckle as you refresh your Facebook screen once more, shaking your head and waiting for lunchbreak to begin.
No - I'm hurt! Was it NaNoWriMo, carrying dog bowls to Brighton or holding a camera for 6 hours that messed up my back? Who knows... I just hope it wasn't my bra. Read on:
- A poor-fitting bra could give you indigestion? - women's mags have been telling us to get measured properly for years - how many of us actually have? The metal in underwired bras "cause energy to stagnate", according to acupuncturists, and no-one wants stagnant breasts now, surely?
- Robot-human theatre hits Japan - I love that sentences like that exist. A play called Hataraku Watashi (I, Worker) "raises questions about the relationship between humanity and technology". I'm still waiting for Terminator 2 to hit the West End, but whatever.
- Kirsten Dunst "quite frightened" - Celebrities being hassled by stalkers and being suitably anxious is not funny, but the fact that her personal assistant carried out a citizen's arrest on the guy is quite brilliant. Go Elizabeth Donohue!
- All-girl cast for E4 sketch show - I'm quite excited about this one. Beehive starts tomorrow night at 10.30 and stars Alice Lowe, Sarah Kendall, Barunka O'Shaughnessy and Clare Thomson "in a particularly surreal and silly comedy universe - with a wardrobe full of outlandish costumes" - sounds awesome.
- Sarah Silverman in the UK! - finally, good old Blighty is poised to receive a dose of the queen of the acid tongue with stand up film Jesus Is Magic hitting cinemas this weekend. After Sachsgate, I can't wait for the complaints to come flooding in.
Enjoy your sarnies, I'll be back soon!