Tad Safran's misogynistic, disgusting "American Beauty?" column in The Times

Tad Safran, thank you for the incredible pile of bullshit that was your column today in The Times. Personally, I can't believe The Times would even publish such a misogynistic, judgmental, and disgusting column, but yet there it was, featured on the front page. For those of you who haven't read Safran's column, he is an American male who, despite being a "massive fan of British women", says that British women let themselves go and that American women are better because they do things like "bikini boot camp". Safran goes on and on and on about how American women spend a ridiculous amount of money on maintaining and "keeping" their looks, and how British women are basically a bunch of socially awkward, frumpy excuses for women.

Safran admits that while he may not be the "greatest prize out there" (a grand understatement, I'm sure) he tells the tale of how he was "hurt" that his friends tried to set him up with a British woman named Sophie, who he described as looking "like a refugee from Hurricane Katrina" in an outfit that was "as sexy as a half-pound of ground meat". My favorite moment of his date with Sophie was when she supposedly dug into her second plate of shepherd's pie and made him realize why "no self-respecting American girl consumes carbohydrates after 2pm".

Okay, lets get some thing straight here, Tad. I'm American. I live in London. I'm a woman. I'm not sure what kind of superficial Princesses you've been speaking to when you're in the States, but I've never met a normal American woman that spends $700 a month on beauty products and $1000 a month on up-keeping her body. You suggesting that American women "ignore their social skills" and that "within 10 minutes of meeting an American woman, I guarantee you will know her salary and most recent medical/ dental procedure" is completely laughable. And did you also know, according to Safran, that American women have a super special way of proving their worth to men?

The good news for men, by the way, is they are convinced that the best way to prove they are equal to a man is by sleeping with him. Um . . . Go ahead, that’ll teach me.

Look, Safran - I'm more than positive that you'll pass off me thinking that you're a judgmental, sexist, pig, simply because, as you say, "American women also take themselves too seriously and are annoyingly confrontational." Of course, while Safran is busy running his mouth about how great American women look, he then says that the "irony" is that they're "obsessed with their looks". (Huh. IMAGINE THAT!?) He clearly wants women to look fantastic, but not be obsessed with it or let it get in the way of "Tad Time".

Safran does admit that "nobody is perfect". He tries to wrap his column up with giving the women of Britain backhanded compliment after backhanded compliment, but really, I highly doubt any self respecting woman would ever go on a date with such a moronic fool. Yet, at the same time I have the sneaky suspicion there are plenty of washed-up, "wrinkle-free, tight-as-a-drum", out of work actresses that would just love to sleep with a piggish, screenwriter, ya know, just to prove that they're equal to him.

Cate Sevilla is the Editor of Dollymix. She doesn't spend $700 on her face a month. I guess that makes her frumpy.

Comments