Keris Stainton continues our Women who blog series with a genuine celebrity!
You may know Emma Kennedy from the Heat magazine adverts. You may know her as Nostradamus in This Morning with Richard Not Judy. You may know her from Suburban Shootout. You may have read her new book, How to Bring Up Your Parents. Wherever you know her from, I bet you know her, but did you know she has a blog? Well you do now.
What was the first blog you ever read?
The first blog I ever read was Richard Herring's. I've known him since we were 18. He is determined to believe that I just copied him but actually the idea to write a blog was my literary agent's. It was supposed to just be an exercise in writing something every day. I never thought anyone would actually start reading it.
Richard is livid that I've got a book deal out of my blog when he hasn't. Ha ha. In your face Herring! His blog is very, very funny and is mostly about how useless he is at being a human being, although he did go through a phase of being obsessed with writing about every poker game he played. I think he makes more of an effort with his blog than I do. I only give myself a 15 minute window each morning to do it. He never misses a day whereas I have a more relaxed approach. I think he might be autistic. But I do love him so.
You've decided to watch all the DVDs you were sent as a film reviewer. What's been the best and worst so far?
Well I've ONLY just started this dvd wheeze and am yet to crack into the obscure European offerings so at the moment I'd have to say the best thus far has been Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind and the worst has been Day After Tomorrow but ask me again in 3 months (there are over 1000 films to watch) and I'll have a different answer for you. I suspect the North and South box set dvds are going to be a particular challenge...
Have you made or lost any friends through your blog?
Yes, both. In terms of making friends - I have now got a hard core group of regular readers, some of whom I have met and I would consider them to be friends. It's kind of mad that they know everything about me and I barely know anything about them but hey, so what? I also became friends with Grace Dent, the writer, after I put her in my top ten list of people I would like to be friends with and she read it. And I also once wrote about how much I admired Jon Ronson and I'm friends with him now too.
As for losing friends - I wouldn't say I've lost proper friends as I'm quite careful as to what I say (unless it's about Richard Keith in which case please be as rude as possible) although I did annoy one friend who felt I had overstepped the mark on one occasion.
The best one was Angellica Bell who is not a friend and was LIVID about what I wrote about her after she voted my best friend Mel out of Fame Academy. I wrote a deliberately over the top blog about pretending that I'd quite like her to die - not in a bad way from ebola or anything and then had a fictional reader come in and chastise me for that until I gradually downgraded to just wanting to give Angellica Bell a chinese burn - anyway -she accused me of making death threats against her. PER-LEEEEASE. I found the whole thing utterly risible. She insisted I remove that blog entry which I reluctantly did. But only because Mel told me to. So now I just think Angellica Bell is a twat.
Rowing, running, rock stardom, archery, poker ... what's next?
Well, I'm still playing the bass, poker and archery so I don't know if I've got time for anything new. I'd really like to learn to sing though. I wish I could sing more than anything. But I can't.
Which is your favourite of your own blog posts?
I am very fond of all the HMB [Hysterical Mum Brenda] and WDT [Welsh Dad Tony] entries, especially after writing the book. They are such a deep seam of material. And they're SO naturally funny. I think they bring out the best in me. And I find them very easy to write.
Is blogging addictive (and, if so, should it come with a health warning)?
I'm not addicted to my blogging at all. In fact sometimes, it's a pain in the neck to think of things to say. I'm very conscious of it not being "And this is what I did next". I always try and pick one tiny thing that happened and focus on that. I think it's the small moments that work best. I probably wouldn't blog at all if it wasn't for a sense of loyalty to my readership. I just do it for them really.
According to Wikipedia (which we know is never wrong), your book - How to Bring Up Your Parents - is "loosely based" on your blog. Is this true? And, if so, does that mean you'll be eligible for the Blooker Prize?
My book is loosely based on my blog although it is very different. I did that deliberately so that regular blog readers wouldn't feel as if they'd seen it all before. I also didn't want the book to read like a lot of blog books which I'm not convinced work that well. I suppose that does make me eligible for a Blooker. Yeah. Like I'd ever win THAT.
Who are your blogging heroines?
I am very sorry to say that I don't know if I've got any blogging heroines. Can I count Grace Dent's Big Brother blogs? They have me in stitches. Yes. I am going to say I can. Grace Dent. The woman is a genius.
Keris co-edits Shiny Media’s fabulous women’s fiction blog, Trashionista and contributes to TV Scoop, The Bag Lady and Bridalwave. She too wishes she could sing. But she can't.