In her weekly column, Camilla Chafer thinks about stereotypes and wonders if she should avoid pink and blue altogether?
I've always tried to avoid forcing social stereotypes on the children. By that I mean, I gave my son a barbie doll... which he fed to our dog and she became headless barbie in one swift gnaw, as well as dumper trucks. My daughter subsequently inherited diggers and tractors to play with. Did this blatant attempt at not pushing them into a particular love of 'girls toys' or 'boys toys' do anything whatsoever for their likes and dislikes? Not a jot, I'll tell you, especially as my daughter is now the frilliest, pinkest girl you could meet, albeit one who carries a telescope, wears an eyepatch and likes to be called 'Captain'.
I really do hate the way toy aisles are divided into 'Girls' (dolls, princesses, dress up, cooking and domestic drudgery) and 'Boys' (macho tractors, bricks, fighting figures and action play). It makes me feel rebellious. Who wants to gift your girl a toy iron? Yuck! I don't even iron, why encourage her? Aren't some things totally non-gender? For example, cooking, cleaning and looking after oneself shouldn't be limited to girls because they supposedly nurture. These are things both genders need to learn and in my opinion, as soon as possible because I won't be loading the washing machine and spelling out how to use the microwave forever.
So why are such toys aimed at little girls? Haven't we got over the age were all little girls were supposed to aspire to was cook, clean, give birth and pander to their big macho hubbies as they did exciting things and earned a crust?
Why should boys get the rough and tumble, action kits whilst their female counterparts sit around looking pretty and doing their nails? Girls should be shimmying up trees, falling in mud and making dens too. Some boys just don't enjoy football, rugby and killing the opposition and would rather play at being chef or cuddling a plush teddy.
The same goes for pink and blue. Admittedly it's quite handy in the early stages to dress your baby in such colours so you don't have to keep saying 'boy!' or 'girl!' everytime a stranger coos. Or if your child is so ambiguous in looks that it really is impossible to tell. Why not shake it up a bit and put your boy in a pink shirt? Oh, that's right, you can't because there aren't any to buy and anyway, he won't look butch, as if he cares at n-month old.
The best thing one can do as a parent is to provide variety and interest and let the child naturally develop a yen towards certain things. My daughter, for example, happily combines a love of Dora the Explorer (for the uninitated, Dora is a cartoon girl who goes on adventures) with the frilliest, pinkest dresses she can don along with her pirate paraphenelia. My son will happily curl up with an adventure book and bake cake when he's in the mood. They haven't been forced into being supremely stereotyped one way or the other and neither will ever, ever get a toy iron.
Camilla Chafer is a freelance journalist and long standing Shiny contributor. She edits Bridalwave and contributes to both Shiny Shiny and Hippyshopper. Life's too short for domestic drudgery so she buys non-iron clothes.
